I just had to caption these two photos, via In Focus.

Almost like something Orwell would write fiction about. For example, derelict buildings devoid of capitalism. See more

Seriously folks, I had it all.

• Died hair
• Butt cut
• Acne
• Braces
• Shaved sides
• … and more!

To all you freshmen out there: This too shall pass.

Photographer had me pose like that because I was a running back. Or at least I tried to be.

Fun fact: Those Puma “soccer” cleats are actually hand-me-downs from my older brother—an understandable side effect of growing up with five siblings.

Photo taken in 1993, after numerous bouts of Bull in the Ring. Image courtesy Cathy Snow (Hi, Mom!)

Get an overpriced degree from a diploma factory. (Plus two free movie tickets! Now that’s higher education.)

I had the chance to cover Real Salt Lake last week on assignment for USA Soccer Stud. In addition to following two World Cup hopefuls from the press box, I snapped some pics with my trusty (but basic) SLR camera. Who knew sports photography was this hard!?

(Sorry for ever doubting you, photojournalists). Following are some of the better shots I took, sans telephoto lens, and by better I mean not very good. Keep reading…

Tim Ormond, a long-time friend and Smooth Harold reader, sent me a photo this week of perhaps the best-named restaurant chain in New Mexico. “I eat here every time I’m on business,” he texted from Albuquerque, referring to Blake’s Lotaburger. “They have a wicked good green chili burger.”

Unbeknownst to Tim, my mother has a photo of me standing underneath this handsome signage in a shoe box somewhere, taken when I was but five years old, as the family was passing through. Again, I’m kind of a big deal. In the southwest, anyways.

Never being good enough in real life, my brother and I would vicariously live the life of true skateboarders on finger boards. We could pop ollies and rail slide on real boards, and rode them often. But you should see how rad a kick flip I can land with this little guy. I used to play with several like him for hours as a child.

So imagine the nostalgic punch to the face after spotting one at the toy store on Friday, while shopping for the girls. I had no idea they still sold them. With Lindsey teasing at my side, reminding me that I will turn 30 this summer, I excitedly considered all available options. I decided an a gnarly Alien Workshop miniature.

Best $3 I’ve ever spent in my adult life. Interchangeable wheels, stickers, and screw driver included in the set!

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Lindsey and I took the girls and our friends The Andersen’s on Friday to Jumping Jacks, an indoor playhouse with more than 6 dozen connected trampolines. I especially liked the warning sign: “Please jump in control. Don’t be stupid!”

I love taking jumps in life, so long as they’re “in control,” and I hate the consequences associated with being stupid. Definitely words to live by. A cute picture of Lindsey and the girls after the break…

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